[Squaredancing] Subject: When in Rome

[Mike Gormley]

M0220sr at aol.com wrote:

> Subject:  When in Rome
>
> Our club is in an area of the state we are in where it is known that 
> clubs in our general area dance "hands up" (waves, etc.) .  When our 
> club dancers visit other clubs  in our same area (and when they visit 
> us...) we know that they dance hands-up and everyone has fun. 
>
> Dancers outside of our general area were taught by their square dance 
> teachers the fore-arm  (and sometimes the handhold) grip for waves, etc. 
>
> We generally have special dances once a month. Out of town callers and 
> cuers.  People visit from other states as well as from one large city 
> to our south.  From the city to our south, whose dancers primarily use 
> the forearm grip, dancers come and generally have a pretty good time 
> at our special dances.
>
> However, there is just one tiny aggravating thing they do....they want 
> to force you to use their style of grip instead of adapting to the 
> hands-up position like we do.  They come to you to do an arm turn or a 
> Swing Thru and will bring your hand down into a forearm grip as much 
> as saying, "You're doing it wrong and I am more than glad to wrench 
> your arm into the proper position for us to get through the Swing 
> Thru....and DON'T DO IT AGAIN!"
>
> Why is that? 

Callers are not allowed enough time to properly teach the class, which 
should include "the rules of visitation".  Allow your caller more class 
time to teach these things in the beginning classes and to stress things 
other than just the calls.

>
> The visitor is traveling into your area, visiting your club, dancing 
> with your club members and other visitors from our area...but they 
> insist on trying to force you to dance their way of dancing.  When my 
> wife and I visit other clubs and/or go to conventions, etc.,  we 
> respect other styles of dancing and look for the way that particular 
> club does certain things when dancing. We don't force our normal 
> "hands-up" on them, we adapt to their handhold.  It avoids awkward 
> situations and the likelihood of having bad feelings.  That usually 
> results in that you hope that person never gets into the same square 
> with you again...even though it is never said.  Some of the members in 
> our club want to put a sign on the front door of our hall announcing 
> to visitors that our club uses a hands-up handhold position but others 
> feel it is a losing fight and the out-of-town visitors would ignore it 
> anyway. 
>
> I was also taught that you never force a lady to twirl (like some 
> aggressive people do) and that if she has her arm down when 
> approaching you don't twirl and if she has her arm up, that is your 
> signal that she doesn't mind twirling on a Right and Left Grand.  And 
> if you do twirl you don't release her in such a manner that she loses 
> her balance and/or goes into orbit or into another square.
>

> To summarize....we live by the old adage "When in Rome..."
>
That's the general rule.

> Richard M.
>
Mike Gormley
Ohio (Until October)
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