[Squaredancing] Whatever happened to being a polite dancer?

[M0220sr at aol.com]

Lines:  Pass Thru, Wheel  & Deal
Lines:  Pass Thru, Bend The  Line
Wave: Swing Thru, Centers Run,  Bend The Line
(or any call where the dancers  temporarily break contact then remake contact 
before turning to another  position)
 
What happens on that last call of  the three examples above?  Somebody turns 
in a small space to make the  turn and somebody takes longer steps to make the 
arc of the turn to  finish in the ending position.
 
When dancers are taught, they are  generally (hopefully) told that whenever 
they come to a position adjacent to  someone else that they make hand contact.  
 
If this is true, then why is it  that some dancers who are in the position to 
do the small turn usually  forgets that they are dancing with at least one or 
two more people who they will  come into contact with them?   What do they 
do? They forget  to take the hand of the person next to them who has just 
finished  doing that Pass Thru or Run figure and they...by themselves...turn to the  
ending position and the other person has to play "catch up" to end in  
position next to them.
 
Don't you think this is kind of  rude on the part of the person who left the 
other person "in the dust"?    These people are so worried that they will not 
be position to do the next  call that they forget that they are dancing WITH 
seven other people. I've  seen these same types of people get big frowns on 
their faces when they are  promenading, getting real close to the couple in front 
of them as if to push  them out of the way so they can get home to do their 
"end of promenade" swing,  hip bump, hands clap, etc.  
 
I was always taught that a lady  is not twirled if she doesn't want to be 
twirled. She initiates the twirl, not  the man.  Do they still teach that in 
class so a lady's arm is not wrenched  or hurt so badly that she has to go home?  
Is it that  some aggressive male  wants to twirl and thinks, "Darn it, you  
are going to twirl or I'll break your arm!"  
 
As to the above scenario, don't  you think that the person  who is going to 
make the small "inside" turn do the following:    He/she should wait for the 
person that did the Pass Thru with them or the Run  around them remake contact 
with them  before they initiate their  turn?  Are they dancing by and for 
themselves or are they "working with the  team"?
 
I doubt if I am the only  member of this group who has some pet peeves about 
what happens  in a square. 
 
Whatever happened to being the  polite dancer?  Thank goodness that the 
number of the type of  people described above are in the small minority.
 
Thanks for letting me get one  item off my chest.
 
Richard
 
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